Sex

Why You Should Consider Bringing A Vibrator On A First Date

First date. Just the words alone are enough to strike fear in the hearts of even avid daters. Why? Because dating isn’t always easy!

By Amanda Chatel

Making conversation with a stranger, sharing things about yourself, and listening to things the other is saying can be daunting. Hell, in some situations, it can be a disaster.

But if you’re a positive person when it comes to dating (I know a few of you must still exist), then it’s important to go into that date fully prepared. Not just emotionally, mentally, and physically, by being dressed to the nines, but with a little somethin’ else too: a vibrator. (In fact, the Tango would be a perfect option for such an event.) Will every first date you go on result in the vibrator being used at the end of the night with a partner? No. But that also doesn’t mean it won’t be used at the end of every first date by someone (Hint: you.)

Here’s why you should seriously consider bringing a vibrator on a first date.

You never know where the night will take you.

Sure, it could be a horrible date with a person whom you never want to see again, or it could be fantastic instead. The chemistry could be on fire, the laughter could be nonstop, and there might even be that moment where you look at each other and agree it’s time to go someplace far less public and far more cozy. If the latter happens to be the situation, you want a toy with you – as well condoms and possibly lube too. Too much wine at dinner, no matter how aroused you are, can make your natural lubrication a little slow to the party and definitely less in quantity, so lube always comes in handy.

The first time can sometimes be awkward.

A friend once told me that every first time she had sex with a guy, it was bad – until she started bringing a vibrator with her. As she explained, it wasn’t just a major icebreaker whenever she pulled it from her bag, but offered a sense of relief to both she and her new partners. Although we’ve all heard stories about how the first time a couple had sex it was amazing, it’s safe to assume these people are either complete and utter anomalies, or maybe they have no idea what amazing sex is. Great sex comes with time and getting to know another person’s body; learning what works and doesn’t work for them. In having a vibrator as part of the equation the first time around, you get to have that conversation earlier than some couples. It’s also a sure thing that the person with the clitoris will orgasm – helping to close that damn orgasm gap – and the person without the clitoris can feel less pressure because, let’s be honest, sex toys are basically a helping hand. We can all use a helping hand.

It’s empowering.

For centuries, women have not only fought to be seen as equal to men but, in some cases, to actually be seen as human with – gasp! – sexual desires. But before I recap the last several centuries from up here on my soapbox, let me get straight to the point: our time has finally come in regards to female sexuality. While there will always be those who grab at their pearls at the thought of a woman not just getting herself off, but even knowing how to get herself off, those people don’t matter. To know what you want and what you don’t want is a testament to owning your sexuality – and something everyone, no matter how they identify, should embrace.

It shows you value pleasure.

Listen, you don’t need to be a hedonist, naked on some island somewhere to realize that pleasure is a very, very important part of human nature. Not just sexual pleasure, but all pleasure. People who value pleasure tend to be generous when it comes to sharing that pleasure. What that means means is if you bring a vibrator to a first date, by night’s end, you’ll both have benefited from using it in more ways than one.