How To Talk To Your Partner About Using Sex Toys

Whether that sex is solo or with a partner, sex toys can really make everyone’s sex lives better. The only problem is that sometimes not both partners are on board with this idea.

If you happen to be someone who’s in a relationship with a person who’s hesitant, or maybe even completely against bringing sex toys into the bedroom all together, then here are five ways to get them to come over to the other side; the sex toy side.

Be honest.

Listen, if you dance around the subject of using sex toys with your partner by saying words like “maybe” or “possibly,” you’re leaving too much room for your partner to doubt that sex toys are the great idea that they are. Instead, be clear. Explain to your partner that using sex toys together isn’t just about the physical aspect, but the emotional one, too. In fact, a 2016 study by We-Vibe of 1,000 men and women, ages of 35 to 55, found that sex toys led to better and more authentic communication. Communication is the foundation of every happy and healthy relationship.

Address how empowering sex toys are.

When we embrace our sexuality, no matter our gender or sexual identity, we become empowered. Sex toys are part of that empowerment because they’re part of embracing one’s sexuality. To be in control of your desires and sexual needs, then to share that with your partner is truly an empowering experience for both. But this isn’t something your partner might be able to fully understand until they give sex toys a try too.

Explain that sex toys take the pressure off both of you.

Because the majority of women (75% to 80%) can’t climax from penetration alone and need clitoral stimulation, sex toys can help a lot in this area. Whether it’s a woman who can’t orgasm during intercourse or a man who’s frustrated that he can’t make his female partner climax, sex toys can take anxiety out of the equation. When we remove the anxiety, both partners can relax and have a far more enjoyable time.

Make it clear that you both deserve pleasure.

To say that pleasure is a human right is an understatement, but frankly there’s no easier way to say it. So: pleasure is a human right! Sex is supposed to be a full body experience between two (or more) people and anything (sex toys) that needs to be included to make sure that ultimate sexual satisfaction is reached, should just be included. It’s as simple as that. Sex toys in no way suggest that one, or even both partners, are lacking. The only thing they do suggest is that humans are sexual beings and deserve pleasure.

Point out that sex toys will always keep things spicy.

If your partner has never walked into a vibrator store, then NOW is the time to bring them. Sex toys have come an extraordinarily long way, especially in just the last decade alone. Innovations have made sex toys so advanced and so in tune with the human body that, between the major technological advances and all the sex toys to choose from out there, it would take a very long time – if ever – for a couple to get bored with their sex life. That right there, alone, should be a big selling point to any partner who’s still wary of using sex toys with you.