There’s no better time of year for ice play than summertime, and National Orgasm Day (July 31st) is a perfect excuse for adding some sensation play alone or partnered, but also to just treat yourself to a day of pleasure and indulgence.
Other holidays, be it religious or traditional – like Thanksgiving or Memorial Day – get a lot more air time, but National Orgasm Day is a very important day in its own right. Orgasms and pleasure have long been not given their due amount of attention, especially the female orgasm, and a day of celebrating it, should, well, be celebrated!
Chill out – with pleasure
Sure you are putting ice cubes in your cocktails or lemonade, but have you involved that ice in your intimate activities yet? Try it. “Running ice along delicate thin-skinned areas, like nipples, inner wrists, and between thighs stimulates nerve endings and can increase climactic satisfaction,” said sex expert and author Antonia Hall.
Buy a new toy
Add a new adult toy to your sexy time. “There are many toys available for every gender and orientation, and it’s always fun to try new things,” says Hall. Discover a new way to pleasure yourself by experimenting alone, or by using a couple’s toy with your partner.
National Orgasm Day is all about pleasure, and pleasure can be more than physical. “My favorite way to celebrate National Orgasm Day is to first, pamper myself!” said Jaclinne Cheng, Founder and CEO of Spicy Lingerie. Take a bubble bath and pour yourself a drink. Next, slip on your favorite piece of lingerie, blast your favorite party song, and dance around while telling yourself how beautiful and amazing you are. “By building up your self-confidence, there’s no doubt that the main event will go off with a… bang,” said Cheng.
Do an honest assessment with yourself.
Are you gratified with your current relationship to your orgasm? Is it something that you want something different from it? Are you paying enough attention to it? Are you having it (with yourself or with partners) the EXACT way you want it? “I can’t think of a better way to celebrate orgasm day than by declaring an improvement, an up level to your relationship with it,” said Robert Kandell “The Modern Mantor”, host of the highly successful podcast, TuffLove and author of unHIDDEN – A Book for Men and Those Confused By Them.
“Once you’ve decided on how the next year of your orgasm will look, take some time on this special day to research on ways to get to this next level of enjoyment. Is it a book? A new toy? A workshop? Or a serious talk with your husband/wife/boyfriend/poly-friend/friend w/ Benefit on where you want to go,” said Kandell. Make a chart? “Set reminders in your phone to pay attention to your orgasm. It is the perfect time to design your practice on where you’d like to be when the next orgasm day rolls around,” said Kandell. We’re willing to set goals for our weight, health, finances, and or having a child. Why not set similar goals for your orgasm?
Think sex-positive thoughts
This isn’t just having sex or talking about sex, but considering your own pleasure and needs in a positive way. Sex isn’t just about pleasing your partner, but about them pleasing you and you pleasing yourself. Give yourself some time to consider that on National Orgasm Day.
But then turn your brain off
It’s hard, I know. But try to have sex without thinking at all. Turn your brain and insecurities off and just focus on the pleasure. That’s the best National Orgasm Day you can give yourself!
And, obviously, have sex
It’s not just for pleasure, though that’s very important, it’s also very good for you: having sex at night puts you in a good mood and boosts your performance at work the next day, according to scientific paper From The Bedroom To The Office.
One orgasm at a time.
Put both your attention on one body. “The one being pleasured relaxes fully and doesn’t get to help in any way, other than making requests if needed,” said Ken Blackman, known as the Yoda of female orgasm. “The one doing the pleasuring is in charge—and if you’re skilled you can draw it out for as long as you want (and your partner can stand) for extended, exquisite ecstasy before the grand finale,” said Blackman. If they try to “help” remind them to relax, you’re in control. When you’re done, be sure to take a break before switching places, so each orgasm can be its own complete, shared experience, rather than tit-for-tat.
Whether you’re masters at getting each other off or just getting to know each other’s likes and dislikes, there’s no better day than Orgasm Day to play with climaxing together. “If penetrative sex gets one of you there a lot faster than the other, try something else, or incorporate clitoral stimulation,” said Blackman. Experiment with different positions, 69, or mutual hand jobs. There are no rules, other than what feels good. (Or great. Or fantastic.) Have fun. And if you blow it—hey, it was an orgasm! There’s worse things to complain about!