8 Ways to Keep Your Long-Term Relationship Sexy AF

Being in love turns into a much deeper and profound feeling: commitment!

You build trust and communication and truly share your life with your partner. But long-term relationships also take a lot of work and I think most people who have been together or married for a while will agree that maintaining a good and healthy relationship takes dedication, hard work and effort but is also very much worth it.  

When it comes to trying new things in any stage of a relationship, it is important to talk about it and to be comfortable with the suggestions brought forward. Here are 8 things you should try in a long-term relationship to keep things spicy.

1. Spontaneity 

Sounds simple, but I personally am a planner, whereas my husband is the type of guy that will call me at 8pm on his way home from work and tell me to get ready in 10 minutes, because he’s got a hotel room booked in Montréal. I haven’t always appreciated those spontaneous trips but now I’m glad he plans them. Doing something different from time to time adds excitement to a relationship and makes it more interesting.

2. Date Nights 

Make time for each other. We all have busy lives, between our jobs, friends, kids, pets and hobbies, but your relationship has to be a priority. While it is very healthy to have a life outside the one you have with your partner, be sure to have designated date nights that are reserved for just the two of you. This doesn’t have to be a huge outing to an expensive restaurant, sometimes it’s nice to just order in and watch Netflix together (if you can agree on a show!)

3. Sex Days 

It can be really fun to schedule a day to try out new and different sex positions and designate a whole day to play together. You can also include card games, dice games or role play into your day. This is a nice way to really be intimate with one another and discover new likes and dislikes in an environment of trust and compassion. In our case, we used a simple Excel sheet to write down what we wanted to accomplish that day, but obviously you can also just go with the flow. 

4. Getaways 

It’s good to change the scenery from time to time and get out of the house. A getaway doesn’t have to be expensive to be fun. For example, there are beautiful suggestions for places to visit in Ontario that are only a few hours away, depending on where you live, and there are likely similar lists for your area. Ultimately, it’s not about the destination, but the quality time spent together. And most importantly, you can have fun and be open to surprises along the way. 

5. Having Sex in Different Places 

We’ve all heard of the “Mile High Club”, probably the most “infamous” adventurous place to have sex. If you’re not ready to go there right away it can even be exciting to have sex in every room of your apartment and try different (safe) surfaces like the couch, a dining room chair, the kitchen counter or the washing machine. Once you’ve done that, feel free to explore spots like a lonely park bench at night or a body of water. If this is too risky, a great discreet way to experience pleasure together is by using a remote controlled wearable vibrator like the Moxie by We-Vibe.  

6. Finding New Hobbies Together 

I’m a big proponent of having your own hobbies and interests, especially if you are in a long-term relationship, but it is still very important to spend time together and have things in common. If you don’t currently have any common hobbies try new things and see if you like them! Hobbies are a wide field, so besides sports activities you could also go to the movies, play board games, do some gardening or build furniture together.  

7. Communication 

Communication is an important characteristic that should be part of every relationship. If you can’t communicate your needs and desires to your partner, it is hard to work on your relationship and grow stronger as a couple. 

8. Trying sex toys together 

Personally, I only started owning and using sex toys a few years into my relationship and after my husband strongly suggested that we try them out. He was definitely right! I started out with solo toys and then ventured into couple’s toys. In particular, the features in the We-Connect App that you can use to control many We-Vibe toys adds a new layer of excitement and novelty to long-term relationships.